arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
