Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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