my mouth tastes like poor choices
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me i tasted like america
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize