Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
