i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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