A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize