Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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