That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
