I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize