I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Randomize
