i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
