Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
