I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I didn't notice because vodka
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
