just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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