as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
We left an ass print on the piano.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
