Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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