Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
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