Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Randomize
