escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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