Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize