champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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