a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
