Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
