White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I just gift wrapped bread.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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