yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
