She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
