There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize