your thong is hanging out like whoa
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
