Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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