Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
All I want is dick and wine.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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