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• (309): View more from Illinois

  dude do u know what u did last night?

  (1-309): View more from Illinois

  do i wanna know???

  (309): View more from Illinois

  you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...

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• (250): View more from British Columbia

  do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?

  (1-250): View more from British Columbia

  tequila

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...

  (1-702): View more from Nevada

  ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha

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• (845): View more from New York

  Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter

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• (347): View more from New York

  Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me

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• (408): View more from California

  IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY

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• (561): View more from Florida

  Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  Dude, where are you?

  (928): View more from Arizona

  In back

  (928): View more from Arizona

  of car

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  ... whose car?

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.

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