Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
