that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize