Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
