I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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