he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
