i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
