It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
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