Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
It was confusing and full of hummus
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
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