so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
