Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I just want nice things and good sex
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
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