Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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