It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
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