Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Randomize