we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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