he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i think i have herpe
just one?
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
