dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
