I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
i permit you to call me
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
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It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
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apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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