Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize