Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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