Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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