No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
